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Tips for executing a will…

Friday, June 11th, 2010

Today, I’m writing about and article I found after being inspired by an article on CNNMoney.com titled What an executor must know before a parent dies.  Basically, I found the article on CNN Money to be lacking, and so I did some digging around and found a more in depth and comprehensive checklist (obviously not meant to replace the advice of a lawyer or accountant, but helpful for the DIY-er) for an executor (trix) of a will.

I myself am currently named as an Executrix of an estate, although I hope not to have to be saddled with the job for many, many years, and, after I got to reading the little article on CNN Money, I began to wonder what the  basics of executing a will were, and whether or not I knew any of them.  I mean, I have no doubt that I can and will carry it out to the best of my ability, but I am no expert, and therefore, would like to have some tips on the process and legal issues that might arise.  The article I found surpassed my expectations.  From contacting the funeral home to contacting a lawyer (if necessary), this checklist has a little bit for everyone.  An important question raised is how to pay for the funeral if it has not been paid in advance.  Life insurance “isn’t paid in a week” as it says, and therefore the author recommends that the owner of the estate have money set aside for these expenses if they don’t pay for them ahead of time!  What a great suggestion!

This article not only has tips for the executor of the will, but also, at the bottom of the checklist it has some tips for the person with the estate.  This is fantastic, if you ask me, because more often than not, the issues that arise from a will (other than people being petty over material mementos) are because the deceased person doesn’t have their affairs “completely” in order.  For those of you with a will, I would double check this list to be sure you haven’t missed something.  The best tip (in my humble opinion) was to have a specific folder, binder etc. that is stored in a place that the executor and another family member know of that has ALL of your important information in it, from wills to passports to divorce decrees…and not copies either!  They need to be the originals!

I suggest to all of our readers to check out the article.  This just seems like information that could be useful for most of us in the future, especially if you follow our suggestions and get yourself our of debt and start building wealth.  You could have a “nice chunk of change” to leave to your family, and you don’t want them to get a headache from your gift!  Happy reading!

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Paying attention to your family…

Wednesday, June 9th, 2010

Yesterday, my beloved sent me an article about a family that is so attached to their “tech” (AKA their gadgets, like phones, MP3 players, laptops, video games etc.) that they spend time with each other without spending time with each other.  They have so many distractions that they can’t function as a normal family.  The 2nd grader has her own laptop!  It’s ridiculous! 

I have always been opposed to the excessive use of tech, especially when you are supposed to be focused on your family.  The fact is, there are times when it’s OK to tech binge, and there are times when it’s not.  Children should not have these tech things that can distract them from their family, and the parents shouldn’t set a bad example by using their gadgets all the time either.  There have been numerous studies that prove that multi-tasking is only possible for 3% of the population without the loss of quality.  With that fact in mind, what do you think happens to the quality of family time when each member of the family has a gadget in their hands and in their face?  Obviously, the quality goes down!

Am I saying that people shouldn’t ever use the tech they have?  No, of course not.  But when “family time” is really family time, it’s probably a good idea to put the tech away for the duration.  For example, when we go on vacation, we heavily limit our use of our tech.  We take our laptop with us to be able to stream music or play it from our music library while we are hanging out at the condo/hotel room.  We take our camera for pictures and the OCCASIONAL video (I’m not a big video fan since I sound every bit the hillbilly that I am :-D ).  We take the GPS to get us there safely, and our cell phones in case of emergency.  We DO NOT use the cell phones while on vacation, with the exception of the phone call made to family informing them of our safe arrival.  We limit the tech because while on vacation, there are PLENTY of other things to do and we should focus on each other, not the world around us.

Think about your household (or, like our example, your vacation).  Do you spend too much time in front of the computer?  Your gaming system?  Your smart phone?  Does your significant other have to ask you the same question 4 times before you hear them?  Have you been caught up in something on the Internet andnot heard your child call to you, or, like the article, have you forgot to pick your child up from school (etc.) because you were too engrossed in something online?  If you struggle to find the time for your family because of your gadgets, I would suggest limiting your time on them, and limiting how much your children see you on them.  If they see you do it, they will also do it, and teaching a child how to ignore their future family isn’t exactly a great life lesson.

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The lottery is robbing potential millionaires…

Friday, May 28th, 2010

In a new post on The Consumerist, the author shared that a recent study found that poor people, those making under $13,000 a year, spend 9% of their income on lottery tickets.   As sad as this fact is, it gets worse if you think about it.

So, I did a little math, and if these people, who don’t make above the poverty line, invested that 9% of their $13,000 a year, which works out to $97.50 a month, over 50 years with a 9% return over that time (reasonable rate of return), they would have a little over $1 million dollars at the end!  Yes, you read that right!  $1 MILLION dollars at the end!  That means that there is a good chance for ANYof those people earning $13,000 a year to have a million dollars when they retire, if they are disciplined enough to invest what they spend on a chance at instant gratification! 

And that’s the difference, isn’t it?  Most of us DO NOT win the lottery.  We know that it only parts fools from their money.  What truly helps people build wealth is discipline with their money and the ability to wait for the payoff over time.  Problem is, I don’t know if a poor person would believe me if I told them that they could have $1 million dollars when they retire.  However, given the study and the little bit of math above, we hope you decide that the lottery is a waste of money and perhaps saving to become a millionaire isn’t as hard as you once thought it was!

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What it truly means to live within your means!

Wednesday, May 26th, 2010

We all know that living within your means is, in its most basic form, living within your household budget.  However, I wanted to point out that there are many other ways that we overspend at work, for example, that can be adjusted and will help more people than just ourselves!

Let’s talk about being a teacher.  It’s a truly stressful job.  They have 100 students (at least) every day that need to be educated with not only the subject that the teacher is charged with teaching but also the life lessons that some of our more lackadaisical parents “don’t bother to” or “forget to” teach their children at home (FYI…it is NOT the job of a school teacher to teach your children the good morals and values of our society…that is in YOUR jurisdiction!).  Needless to say, it’s a little overwhelming.  What’s more, the money system set up around the education system (at least the parts I know about, as I am not an expert) is ludicrous.  For example, the school system allots each teacher a certain number of copies that they are allowed to make per year on the copy machine, and if they want to make more, they have to pay for them!  That puts added and undue pressure on the teacher, because let’s face it, toner and copy paper are cheap.

 However, silly as it is, it is the workplace version of “living within your means”.  But not all teachers do.  They will either spend money out of their own pocket to buy supplies, or send home a list of supplies that the parent MUST provide for all of the various projects the teacher wants to do.  All I have to say is, my oh my, what a mess!  Teachers are given a budget.  They should have to work within that budget (and yes, I am absolutely certain that their budget is too low and doesn’t help much, but it is what it is).  By buying supplies out of their own pocket, they are saying that the budget is meaningless, and that sets the wrong example for the students.  I love the generous nature, but they shouldn’t take the burden on themselves and set a bad example for the children.  And if they decide to pass the cost onto the parent?  Well, the parents at home have their own budgets and money problems to worry about, and the decision to have all of these wonderful projects impacts them too!

So, what is a teacher to do since they’re being squeezed on both sides?  Get creative!  If they figure out less costly projects and methods for teaching the same lesson, they will be able to stay within the budget the school set for them without passing the cost on to the parents!  I know that the replacement projects won’t be as full of bells and whistles, but the object of the lesson is to teach something, and that usually doesn’t require fancy projects.  Also, as long as the teacher has a computer with an Internet connection, she can show the students whatever she wants to show them!  For example…let’s say the teacher originally wanted to have the students build volcanoes for science class.  All she has to do is have them read the chapter, discuss it in class, then show the students this on the projector.  It’s not AS cool, but it works and it’s pretty much free!

I’m not trying to pick on teachers, just so you know.  I just wanted to give an example of how we have a mental disconnect between living within our means at home and at work.  We shouldn’t be frugal at home and a spendthrift at work.  Apply the same principles at both places, and get creative on your savings!

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Words of wisdom for the new graduate!

Friday, May 21st, 2010

I found a very interesting article on CNNMoney.com today, featuring some practical and funny advice for those  people graduating from school (whether that be high school, trade school or college).  The article, titled 3 things to tell a new graduate, lists the following bits of advice, in no particular order (at least, I hope it’s not in order):

  • With regard to your career, the author suggests that you heed your enemies.  The logic behind this advice is that the people you have trouble with are generally those people that have the greatest insight into you and your attitudes and faults.  What these people have to say will help you improve as a worker/entrepreneur…if you only take the time to listen.
  • With regard to the stock market, buy and hold your funds.  The author and I agree on this…people think that they can beat the stock market, but in reality, almost no one can (and you are probably not the exception).  If you buy funds and then keep them over the long run, you’re more likely to make money, at the very least thanks in part to the ability to avoid taxes and other fees.
  • Don’t be a fool with regard to your love life.   When lovers quarrel, each has the blame around 50% of the time.  Understanding this fact will help you build the kind of relationship that isn’t as susceptible to a divorce.  And as all of us know, either from personal experience or the experience of a friend or loved one, divorce sucks.  We don’t want it and should avoid it at all costs (both financially and emotionally). 

That’s it.  3 very simple little lessons that might save you a lot of headache or heartache as your graduate enters the post high school, trade school or college life that they have worked so hard to achieve.

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90 days same as cash…what a ripoff!

Wednesday, April 21st, 2010

Anything that sounds too good to be true is too good to be true.  Of this, I am sure.  The 90 days same as cash gimmick definitely qualifies as something that sounds great, but really isn’t.  Never ever fall for it.  Why?  I’ll tell you…

When a person agrees to a 90 days same as cash gimmick, they are saying that they will pay the full amount (and not a penny less) within the 90 days allotted.  How many of these people actually do that?  Well, according to Dave Ramsey’s website (and a few others), only 12% of people who do 90 days same as cash financing actually pay it off within that time frame!!  Hello!  9 out of 10 people don’t do what they say they’ll do!  This means that you shouldn’t even think about doing this!  But you say, “Oh Emily, I will be the one that pays it off in time”.  Oh really?  Well, if you can make such a guarantee, then you should just pay cash in full in the first place! 

IF, however, you decide that you want to fall for the gimmick, and you don’t pay it off on time, the company will backdate the interest on your purchases to the 1st date of purchase.  And how much interest will you be charged from day one?  Probably around 24%!  So, you went from no interest to 24% over the entire length of time you have the loan (it is a loan, even if you didn’t realize it).  What a ripoff!

What you should know as a consumer is that there is NO financing option offered by any business that is a “good deal” for you!  They will always find a way to part you from your money.  Do the smart thing and just say no to their gimmicks!

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The single person’s struggle with bills and budgets…

Wednesday, April 14th, 2010

We talk a lot about couples on our website, but we aren’t oblivious to the fact that many of our readers are single, and that our single readers have different needs and questions than our other readers.  Our single readers have no one to be accountable to except themselves.  They have to do everything on their own.  That means they need a lot of information on how to plan for the future, and no one to help them acquire it.  What do they do when they want to make a budget, or start saving for retirement or pay off debt?  Well, these are the first 2 steps they should look at when they are ready to get on track. 

The first steps they should take toward getting their finances in order should be to find a person to whom they can be accountable.  This can be a parent, a best friend or even the pastor at their church.  It doesn’t matter who they choose, it merely has to be someone that they can trust with their private information that also has good financial sense (this doesn’t mean the person with the flashiest car or house, because those people are usually in debt themselves).  After finding someone to help keep them on “the straight and narrow path”, they need to sit down and write out their budget.  Don’t know where to begin?  Well, for now I’ll suggest this form to help you singles get started (be on the lookout for a better form from us in the future).  The important thing, no matter if you’re single or in a relationship, is that you’re on a plan and working toward a goal (hopefully to be debt free and saving for retirement). 

We always encourage our readers to leave comments with questions they might have and today is no exception.  Single or married, feel free to ask us what steps to follow up with, or any other questions you might have! 

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Digging ourselves out of the hole our parents dug for us.

Wednesday, April 7th, 2010

One of the hardest things a person can do is admit the faults of their loved ones.  We don’t want to say hurtful things about someone we care about, especially if we have to say it to their face, but sometimes, it is necessary to admit those faults.  Not with anger or mean spirit, but more with the intent of constructive criticism.  So, here we go with some constructive criticism and a little bit of generalizing.  

I want my readers to understand that I don’t say this lightly, but I feel that the Baby Boomer generation made choices that, while right for them at the time, have shaped the attitudes of us Gen Xers and Gen Yers to rebel against the way our parents taught us. 

What am I referring to?  What choices did they make?  Given the innovation of the times, and the changes in attitude toward working women, the Baby Boomers were able to send both parents to work, which resulted in a higher income, but took parents away from their children.  This meant that they weren’t there all the time to ensure their children were learning all the life lessons they should, and given that they had VCRs, game consoles and personal computers to contend with, this might not have been best for every family.

Instead of learning to eat healthy and get plenty of physical activity, some of us only learned what TV dinners were and were allowed to sit and play game consoles instead of physical games outdoors.  Instead of learning to save money and pay for what we wanted with cash, we watched as our parents (and other influential adults in our lives) charged what they wanted, to be paid for over time at a later date. 

Watching this happen, most of us started off as adults who charged everything and ate whatever we wanted without caring about exercise or health.  How did this affect us?  Did we sit back and let it happen to us, teaching the same to our children?  For many of us, we did not.  We decided to take better care of ourselves and our finances.  We decided that dinner should be made from  healthy ingredients, instead of being microwaved in a box.  We decided (or were forced to realize through too much debt) that financing everything we want isn’t a smart financial decision in the long run…that living paycheck to paycheck just to “have it all” right now isn’t really living.  We decided that family time IS more important than 70 hour work weeks just to make a few extra bucks. 

Does this make our parents terrible parents?  Of course not!  We are who we are because of them!  Different parenting styles make the world go round.  It just means that some of us have to dig ourselves out of a hole, be that weight gain/health issues or debt.  Either way, we’re teaching ourselves the lessons we missed, and now just have to remember that for our own children!

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Tolerance.

Wednesday, March 24th, 2010

There are a thousand wonderful traits a person can have, and a worthwhile trait of note is tolerance.  Tolerance, simply put, is enduring hardship or having patience.   I’m talking about more than just being tolerant of other races and religions.  I’m talking about tolerating quirks, attitudes and irritating traits that the people (possibly friends, family or coworkers) around you display that make you want to scream.  Why is this important?  Well, I’ve learned over the years that being intolerant can cause you more trouble than it’s worth. 

Why does it cause you so much trouble?  Well, because when you’re intolerant of something, you’re the one experiencing the turmoil, not generally the person of whom you are intolerant.  So even though they might be the one acting like the idiot, you are the one irritated and fuming.  That doesn’t exactly help your mental well being (or your blood pressure)! 

It’s a personal growth experience when you learn to tolerate someone or something.  The drama that occurs during that “experience” is something that I’m sure most of us would rather avoid (as pointed out above), but instead, we need to learn from it and create a working/lasting relationship with the person(s) in question. 

How can you give yourself a better opportunity to be a tolerant adult?  Well, honestly, I’m still learning myself, but my advice from what I’ve learned so far would be to learn tolerance as early in your life as you can!  Learn to accept that people are different, we do things differently, and if someone does something that irritates you, try to be understanding of them and their point of view.  Don’t let them get to you! 

A quick note:  Before you read this and quickly move on, saying to yourself that you are tolerant and this doesn’t apply to you, I really want you to stop and think about how you handle those types of situations…we all have room for improvement!

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Spoiled children and silly parenting.

Wednesday, March 3rd, 2010

One of my best friends shared a story with me the other day that I felt compelled to share with our readers today.  She was at her salon, getting a haircut, when a mother came in with her 5 year old daughter for a manicure.  Big deal, you might say, until I tell you that the manicure was for the daughter, and while she was there, she also purchased the 5 year old a spa package!  What silliness!  What 5 year old child needs a manicure, much less a spa package!  Does she need a massage after having such a hard day?  A facial, to get rid of all those blemishes and wrinkles?  Seriously, what possible reason could a child need a spa package?  There isn’t a good reason.  This is simply an example of a mother being overly indulgent and not realizing the damage that that kind of parenting can cause. 

Instant gratification is having a lack of impulse control, and, conversely, delayed gratification  is having the ability to wait for something you want (i.e. willpower or impulse control).  In our society we tend to think of children as having no impulse control, and learning this ability as they get older and become an adult.  Well, what happens when the child isn’t taught impulse control, and grows up with the same attitudes they had as a child?  We think that these children grow up to be the people who struggle with any vices that require willpower/impulse control, such as spending money and overeating etc.  These people still have the “I want it now” attitude, and whatever “it” is, they don’t deny themselves the treat, because they “deserve” it.  Can you imagine what the little girl with the spa package at age 5 will act like as an adult if she  doesn’t learn to have self control (which is not likely to be learned from her mother, I’m sorry to say)?  So, what’s the good news?  If you struggle with impulse control, you can learn it as an adult.  You just have to take each instance where you need willpower and ask yourself why you need the item now, and if it’s worth it.  It’s not easy.  You will fail on occasion.  But every time you don’t fail, that’s one step closer to mastering the skill!

Delayed gratification is one of the biggest tricks up the sleeves of people who succeed.  They know how to wait for what they want.  Knowing this, as a parent, make sure you teach your child how to have willpower, and as an adult (who lacks willpower), decide that you aren’t going to fall victim to your childhood whims of instant gratification and help yourself succeed!

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