Sure, eventually, by living below your means for many years, saving your hard earned dollars in well chosen investments, and paying cash for a new sports car you too can have a neighbor who envies your success. The punch line is that for 20 years your neighbors thought you were flat broke because you drove a beater to work everyday and didn’t go out to eat at Applebee’s every night. And even funnier, when you can finally truly afford the shiny toys you’ve always wanted, you might find that your priorities have changed and you value your hard earned financial security over some overpriced driveway eye candy.
My first car was half 1985 Ford Tempo and half 1986 Mercury Topaz painted 1993 Geo Polynesian green metallic (pretty close to teal). I drove it until I wanted to get to and from my college dorm and its transmission didn’t. After that, I drove a 1979 Chevrolet Malibu to and from work and school for 10 more years. And this car way by no means in good shape- rust everywhere, busted air conditioning, crumbling interior. I paid less than $1000 for each of these cars.
Over the past few years, my wife and I have eliminated our credit card debt and were able to save up the cash to pay for a gently used 2006 Chevrolet Equinox when it was time to replace the Malibu earlier this summer. We needed the ability to tow stuff- lumber, furniture, etc.- so we didn’t have to rely on expensive delivery services and the kindness of friends and strangers. It was really hard to drive our old cars while everyone else was buying new ones, but the strength we found in our plan to become and stay debt free got us through it. Now, we have a car just as new as our neighbors’ cars, but we have the fantastic advantage of having no car payments! (Yes, we’ll talk more about our 5-year journey to debt freedom at length in future posts.)
I can’t imagine anything that people are more obsessed with than cars. I can’t begin to count the times that friends and co-workers gave me grief over the decaying car in the parking lot. “When you are going to buy a new car?” was a common question. I was actually told to take the the University of Kentucky (our alma mater) sticker out of the window because it was embarrassing! It was as if people actually thought I hadn’t noticed that my car was 30 years older and a fair bit rustier than everything else on the road! They actually thought they were doing me a favor by informing me that I wasn’t driving the “right car” given my job in the electronic security industry… like they were giving me permission to take on a car payment to save my dignity. Sure, some of them were just having fun, but more than a few were deadly serious.
It was interesting to see how people were uncomfortable with the apparent mismatch between the car I drove and the job I drove to every day. I was challenging how they defined success without saying a word, and people were not happy. Now, after years of “sacrifice” and delayed gratification, I finally have that car, but without the monthly obligation to a bank that most people just accept as “normal.”
So, rather than spending time trying to define your own personal success by other people’s standards, you would be better served by spending time thinking about what “success” means to you. If you are one of those who define success as conspicuous consumption at or just beyond their means, then get ready for a long ride. There is always something newer and shinier. The target is always moving away from you. If your are accumulating debt to chase those toys, then you are are wasting a lot of your income on interest payments that could otherwise be used to pay cash for the newer, shinier toys later. If you are in this trap, you have to figure out how to break the cycle. Sometimes, you just have to skip Applebee’s that night and keep driving that rusted out beater for a few years… or maybe even a decade!
If you are investing your hard earned dollars in what you think are your friends’ opinions of you, the outflow of cash and the inflow of stuff will never end. At some point in time, you just have to decide that you “have enough” and let the world go by. Decide where you want to be and make a plan to get there… and stop there… or make a new plan. Surround yourself with cheerleaders, not critics. Surrounding yourself with critics makes reaching your goals that much harder. And don’t let other people define what success is for you. Success is a very personal thing. Nobody else has as much of a vested interest in YOU as you do.
Next week: Jack of all trades, master of none.
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